Don't you just hate love circles?
by Dragon Mistress Eri
Summary: Ruto is in love with Link, who is in love with Zelda, who likes one of the palace guards named Cain, who likes Malon, who likes another one of the palace guards named Tarren, who likes Ruto. Watch their amusing adventuer and see who ends up with who!
1. Default Chapter

Ruto is in love with Link, who is in love with Zelda, who likes one of the palace guards named Cain, who likes Malon, who likes another one of the palace guards named Tarren, who likes Ruto. Link was sneaking through the palace court yard to see Zelda. After shoving his armor through, followed by his shield, followed by the master sword, he climbed through that little hole with quite a bit of grunting. He pushed through the hole and landed on a bomb, "Oh shit"  
  
BOOM  
  
Link blinked, now a little charred. He started to re equip his weaponry, being very careful of the bombs this time. He began to sneak past the guards and froze as he almost fell off but quickly got back up before the guard could notice his blunder. He leap off the beam lightly landing on the ground. He smirked, 'Almost there' he thought happily easily getting past the rest of the guards. He came to a stop and saw Zelda peering in the window, just as he had when he first met her all those years ago... "Hello" he said brightly, Zelda jumped and turned around.  
  
She let out a sigh of relief when she saw him "Oh it's only you Link" she said sounding very relived "Scared me for a moment" she said resting a hand over her heart. "What brings you here?" se asked smiling warmly at her old friend.  
  
"Oh, was just in the area, decided to come see you" he said casually, 'Took me a day to get in the area but that's another story!' He thought trying to keep his calm cool exterior.  
  
"And sneak past the guards, why don't you just use the door??" she asked moving her hands so they were clasped together at her stomach. "I can get you clearance" she began and started to talk about it. Link wasn't exactly listen to what she was saying, he was watching her. The way her eyes lit up, the way her mouth moved. Ahh it was sheer bliss for Link. If only he knew...  
  
Later...  
  
Zelda wandered the hall bored. Link had left a while ago and there were only two guards around her age in the palace. Tarren, a good friend of hers, and Cain, her crush. She let out a dreamy sigh and played with a lock of golden hair. "Cain..." she let out another far off sigh as she whispered his name. Both he and Tarren had some time off so she was left with out any company her age. Where did they say they were going? Oh yes! To visit Malon! She had wanted to go with them but had "royal duties" to attend to. These duties being sitting in a chair while her father gave a speech. So exciting she almost fell asleep. After that she had to attend some dinner, now she was left wandering the halls of the palace. She was starting to wish Link had been allowed to stay longer but her father wouldn't hear of it. She made her way out into the court yard the starts twinkling above her. She pulled out her ocarina and started to play a soft tune. She was still bored as she stopped playing. She wished now more then ever Cain or Tarren were there. They weren't due back a few more days, in the morning they were leaving for lake Hilyia to see Princess Ruto, who she was fairly certain Tarren liked. But Ruto had a thing for Link, but who did Link have a thing for, Malon? Maybe, or maybe he liked Ruto...? She pushed the thought aside and headed inside finally deciding to go to bed.  
  
At the ranch...  
  
Malon sat with Cain and Tarren having a grand old time. The trio was sitting around a fire in the back field. "....so after switching to his third excuse he gave up, I think he was trying to steal something from the palace" said Tarren finishing his story  
  
"Why would any one want to do that?" asked Malon leaning back a bit. She received the same look from both guards "Right... Sorry about that, I can be pretty dense at times" she said with a laugh.  
  
The other two laughed as well "That's what makes you so lovable!" said Cain grinning. Malon didn't realize the context this was being said in. If she had, she may have reacted differently. Instead she grinned, Tarren pretended to retch. He then ducked under Cain's boot.  
  
"Ah ha!" said Tarren in his normal light hearted manor "Now what shall you do? I have your boot!" He said holding the boot above his head "Ew, and it smells, take it back" he said throwing it back at Cain, he and Malon laughing "Cain what have you stepped in? That thing smells like hag!" he covered his nose with both hands "Cain, ya gotta stop kicking those hags, they really don't like it" Malon had fallen onto her side laughing Cain was grinning widely.  
  
Cain shook his head still grinning and pulled his boot back on "It doesn't smell that bad, does it?" he asked looking down at his boot  
  
Tarren fell over laughing and Malon broke out into another fit of giggles causing poor Cain to go a lovely shade of red. Tarren taking pity on his friend decided to go and chase some cukoos, who quickly went and tried to attack him. Cain and malon made a run for the barn to find safety while Tarren hopped on his horse and began to race with the white feathered fiends. "You'll never beat me!!!!" he said with a laugh. He had spoken too soon as one of the faster cukoos had caught up with him and was attacking him "Ack!" he tried to swat the creature back hut in doing so lost speed more of the feathered fiends catching up with him, putting on a burst of speed heading for the barn ignoring his cuts. Malon flung the door open as he raced in and slammed it shut before the cukoos could get in.  
  
"Oh Din!" she cried as she saw Tarren's wounds "You got beat up by birds Tarren!" she said helping him off his horse with the help of Cain. Tarren grunted in response putting his weight on his less bloodied leg "Take a seat" said Malon searching through a bag, Cain forced his friend onto a pile of hay then Malon came back with a variety of medicinal supplies. "Of all the things to be attacked by Tarren!" she said with a sigh as she started to bandage his leg.  
  
"Pah! Next time I'll beat those feathered fiends!" He drew his blade and tried to get up, Cain relived him of the weapon and Malon pushed him back down.  
  
"I think you took a few too many hits to the head Tarren" said Cain slipping his friends blade into his belt. Just like Tarren to save Cain from embarrassment like that. He knew Tarren was in no life threatening danger from his wounds, but he was defiantly out of it from being attacked by of all things, a cukoo. He smirked a bit and shook his head, 'Same old Tarren' he thought to him self. Malon finished bandaging him up, Cain watching her the whole time. Although he had to stop to help her make a slightly delusional Tarren go to bed, the two headed outside again the cukoos leaving them alone. "He's a good guy," said Cain looking up at the sky "But does some really stupid things"  
  
Malon laughed "It's who he is" she said with a smile 'Who I love' she thought hopelessly her eyes glazing over slightly, she glanced over at the window and saw the blue haired man on his back, sprawled out across the bed of hay they had put him on, snoring, quite loudly.  
  
"No Mommy... I don't want to wear Cain's boots... The smells like hag..." he said in his sleep, Malon and Cain exchanged glanced before both breaking out laughing.  
  
"I think he'll be fine in the morning" said Cain with a smirk, Malon nodded still giggling "Hm, guess my boots DO smell that bad" he said with a light smile. She laughed and looked over at him, looking him in the eye. He turned a bit red and looked away 'Where was Tarren when you needed him to make a fool of him self and avoid the unpleasant moments?' he wondered, then remembered asleep from already doing it once that night. 'Guess I was just meant t embarrass myself to night' he thought sadly, part of him wanted to tell her how he felt so badly! Yet the other was too afraid to, he knew she was in love with Tarren, who was in love with Ruto, who was in love with Link, who loved Zelda, who loved... Who DID Zelda love? He decided to ask her some other time. He leaned against the fence and listened as Malon started to sing Epona's song. He closed his eyes and listened to the sweet melody. Anything sung by her sounded sweet. He didn't know why he thought that, maybe it was his feelings for her, or maybe it was just her voice. Most likely a mix of both.  
  
In the morning the two took off to Zora's domain, Tarren, it turned out, healed amazingly fast, and was fine in the morning. After saying their good byes to Malon they rode up Hyrule field to the river that ran along side it. The plan was they'd bring Ruto and Malon back with them to the palace for Zelda's upcoming birthday party. "Do we have to swim?" asked Tarren looking down into the swiftly moving currents.  
  
"Yes" said Cain calmly dismounting his horse, he was used to this region as he was one of what are called "shared guards" meaning he served both Zelda's family and Ruto's. He moved a bit up stream from the bit of land he was trying to reach and dove in, the icy waters turned every one of his senses up, Tarren laughed at poor Cain who un-knowingly had yelped as he plunged into the icy depths. After climbing onto the land mass he flipped off Tarren who blew a raspberry at him.  
  
Tarren, for once in his life, was smart and didn't get off his horse, instead he moved back to get a running starts and jumped over the water. "Atta girl Rayne" he said patting his horses neck who nickered softly. Cain's jaw dropped, since when could Tarren do THAT!? Tarren looked over at him "What?" He blinked now a little confused.  
  
"It's nothing" said Cain shaking his head shivering, he was starting to wish his horse could jump like that. They both made their way down the path, Tarren left his horse and went ahead on foot. After about a day's travel, this being as Cain kept missing the jump and falling into the icy waters again, and again, Tarren was starting to think his friend was going to catch something. After FINALLY making it to the waterfall they both realized neither of them had an instrument. "Can you sing?" asked Cain watching the waterfall.  
  
Tarren shook his head "Not well" he cringed remembering when he had been asked to sing once for the royal family, to be blunt, it hadn't ended well "How about you?"  
  
"Dunno, never tried, I usually brought my flute" he said with a sheepish smile "So should we just ad lib it or do I have to try and sing?" he looked hopeful that he wouldn't, he had sung before, but he didn't like to.  
  
"Well try!" Tarren was starting to fear that the water had gotten stuck in his head affecting his hearing. Cain gave his friend a desperate look before attempting to sing the song, the falls didn't move. "Now even I think I'm a good singer, dear Din, that was terribly man!" Cain gave him an icy look. So what now? They could try breaking through the stone that had been put at the entrance at lake Hilya, but it seemed unlikely they'd succeed. As if on cue Link surfaced from the pool by them. "Hello!" greeted Tarren warmly, Link could sing.  
  
Link climbed out of the water "Hey, what are you two doing here?" he asked sounding a bit confused "Shouldn't you be at the palace?" he asked sounding a bit confused.  
  
"Vacation" said Cain simply "Can you do us a major favor? Neither of us can sing and I forgot my flute and..." he let his voice trail off and looked over at Link  
  
"And you need me to help you guys get through the falls?" he finished, Cain and Tarren nodded both terribly embarrassed. "Ok" he took out his ocarina and began to play the soft melody of Zelda's lullaby. The falls began to slow and then stopped. The three guys jumped over the small gap, Cain missed though and went plummeting into the water again. After dishing him out they went and this time Cain made the jump. Tarren was really starting to worry.  
  
Ruto was waiting at the landing looking very amused "Are you alright Cain?" she asked in her usual floating voice. She was wearing a long silk dress, Tarren was surprised to see this as she usually wore nothing or that short purple dress. She had told Tarren once she liked that dress as it allowed movement while longer once didn't, yet, she really did look great in it, the blue went well with her coloring.  
  
"Fine" he said with a sheepish smile "And how are you milady?" he asked going into his 'On duty' mode.  
  
A smile flickered across her face "There is no need for you to be formal Cain" she said turning and heading down the ramp gracefully, Tarren some how knew she had practiced walking in that dress. No way she could move like that in it if she hadn't.  
  
Tarren decided to ask her about it later when Cain and Link weren't there. He followed after the other three as Ruto lead them up to where they would be sleeping. They headed out the back and to where Jabu Jabu (Is that right?) and over to the cave which had been cleared of all monsters and furnished for those staying with the Zoras who didn't have gills. It was quite comfortable after the ice was gone. Beds had been brought in along with some other things to furnish the room. "You've been awfully quite Tarren" said Link giving him a rather concerned look after Ruto had left "Are you feeling ok?" he placed a hand on his forehead as if to check his temperature.  
  
Tarren brushed his hand away "I'm fine" he said before heading off through some random passage, he liked Link, but his spirits, and mood, were killed when he saw how Ruto had been acting towards Link. 'She never does anything like THAT to me' he thought bitterly. The looks she gave him those overly friendly seductive smiles. He sighed and stopped in mid wander. "I should just give up on her, she's head over heels for Link... Why would she bother with a palace guard when she could have the hero of time?"  
  
  
  
DT: And that's the end of chapter one! The other chapters most likely won't be this long. I know I OOC Tarren at the end but he was depressed and yeah . well tell me if you liked it or didn't, if you didn't tell me why but be nice about it. Constructive criticism.  
  
Justin: Evil plot...  
  
DT: And? My plots always are. With twists o plenty! MUWAHAHAHA-  
  
Justin: *covers her mouth* Please review and if you'd like to get in contact with DT here e-mail her or add her on msn at dt_queen_of_the_loonys@hotmail.com 


	2. Who likes who? Who even knows?

DT: To dark mushroom of death, you can take the idea but come up with your own characters, DON'T STEAL CAIN AND TARREN!! THERE MINE ALL MINE!!! *glomps them both*  
  
Tarren: How many times has she done this already?  
  
Cain: *wearily* Over 10 today  
  
DT: *un glomps* Thank you to the ONE person who reviewed! I'd like to read your rip off of my little fic. But may I suggest using Sheika (spelling?) and as you suggested Dark Link as to Tarren and Cain, STEAL THEM AND DIE!!! And please say who you nicked the plot off of  
  
Justin: Now move onto the fic before you lose your readers.  
  
DT: =P fine  
  
. I know that  
  
Cain: -_- moron  
  
Justin: *gives DT an odd look*  
  
DT: It comes naturally. Now review or you won't get to see these two again! *points to Cain and Tarren* 


End file.
